forget my nature...

I'm beginning to think that no one is ever going to upload the photos of us all mudding over spring break...nor whether I even feel the need to share the rest of the pictures. I'm sure they'll make their way on here eventually. So I guess I'll go ahead and get serious. Serious as a buzz. Or whatever. I've really noticed the long-lasting effects that taking Lexapro has had on my psyche lately. I've become much more nervous in odd situations. I never want to sit next to strangers...like I'm scared they'll touch me and I'll freak the fuck out. Not exactly sure what it is. I really do not want to go out much anymore...I just have to drag myself out to see people because I know it's for the best. I've tried my best to continue like normal, but I definitely feel a lot different now that before. I have the toughest time letting myself even think about any type of emotional anything. It really depresses the shit out of me...and I'm not wanting that...so I just ignore everything that might possibly bother me...out of sight out of mind. I know that isn't the way it should be, but lately my minimalistic urges have taken over and I've just really wanted the bare (or bear if this is Jungle Book) essentials. Disenfranchisement. Keeping away from all that matters to reach a goal and to better understand yourself. I feel that's what I'm doing, but it seems there are a lot of people getting hurt around me because of my detachment. I hope it all evens out soon enough. I know it will.
The world works in mysterious ways that science cannot explain.
I now have a place to live in Auburn for the summer. My brother met a wide receiver from Tampa, FL that signed with Auburn this year, and then some guy overheard them and offered them his townhome with an extra bedroom. SCORE. So my dream come true of living with my little brother during college is at least coming through for a little bit. Hell. I even am wearing an Auburn shirt right now. I taught a Biology lab here at Alabama with an Auburn shirt on. I'm so proud of him, and so excited that I get to spend a little time with him...it has been about six going on seven years.
OOOOOOOOOOOohhhhhhhhhhhhhh